Full of Joy

HAPPY NEW YEAR'S EVE! i, for one, am excited about this holiday. usually i'm not that excited, but tonight- my household is having the best kind of night. we are having chili, chips and salsa, (and i don't know yet what boog is bringing for drinks and dessert!) while watching, "sleeping with the enemey". (don't ask me why!) we are all wearing comfy sweats and sweatshirts as it is snowing heavily, and we are in for the night! it's hard to be home, and leave my family- but it's good to be back!

Take you time. Relax.

i just spent a beautiful evening with two beautiful friends. it was such a special time to bond, open our hearts, talk, and just enjoy our moment together at Cafe Latte. i could have sat there all night and talked the time away. i feel touched, and grateful for this gift of friendship.

something has been troubling me, and where better to express it then on my own personal blog? there is this person in my life (to protect the identity of this said individual, i am making this person a male with the name of jay) who has been pointing out an aspect of my character a lot lately. at first, it was funny. jay pointed out that my "glass is half empty". i immediately responded "whatever!" (me? defensive?!) well, i thought about that a lot...so later on, i said to jay, "you know what. you're right. my glass is half empty, and i think that's why it hurts so much to hear you say that." jay laughed out loud, thinking i was really funny for saying that. i guess it was funny that day. as time has gone on, jay keeps saying this about me. "you really ARE half empty" he keeps saying. well for crying out loud. i'm sorry that i have to be safe. i'm sorry that i have to be protective of me, my emotions, my feelings, my thoughts, my ...

sometimes it's the littlest gifts in life that mean the most. sometimes it's the littlest moments in life that mean the most as well. either gifts or moments usually come quite unexpectedly, and bring more joy then i realize at the time. a friend gave me four quarters today because she knew i was doing laundry, and had run out of quarters. now i can do another load, and i'm so happy to be able to get my whites done! it was a gift seemingly small, but in my heart-it was so much more then 4 quarters. a simple gesture goes such a long way. i went to visit my little friend who turned 4 today. her sister let me into the house, and when my little newly turned 4-year-old-friend came down the stairs, i was struck with the happiness that she radiated. she was wearing a pink ribbon that said something about her turning 4 today. she was so proud of that little pink ribbon. i was also struck by the fact that she was wearing an adorable little sweater-dress with tights. her da...

i'm sad. that's all there is to it. i always have this underlying sadness in my deepest heart of hearts, but usually it's kept locked away. i occupy my mind with work, friends, church, groups, projects, tv, movies, reading, talking on the phone, eating, running, music...anything except dwelling on sadness. it's not healthy to mope around and wish for things that are out of my control. because that's exactly it: things are out of my control. i was talking to my manager today about all kinds of things. he brought up the option for me to become an assistant mananger. every few months the subject resurfaces. i always go back to my old stand by: "starbucks is a means to an end (money!) and it's not what i want to do for my life, i have a higher purpose..." yet in the mean time, i have no idea when this "higher purpose" is finally going to play out. quite possibly never. so should i pursue something "bigger" in my current care...

“Borne Supremacy”, “The Supremes”, a supreme pizza, a supreme burrito, a supreme being/superhero. Jason Borne is the best at what it is he does- he’s unstoppable. The Supremes are a hugely successful chic band. Supreme foods are loaded with everything imaginable- the best at what they are. A supreme super hero is untouchable. But, our God being supreme? God’s supremacy is too important, too great to describe. He is greater then any president, any king, any CEO, any leader, any ruler. He is above all, before all, superior to all…and still feels indescribable. Talk about supreme. Talk about having major authority over everything- visible and invisible. I decided I wanted a cup of hot tea this morning. I filled up my new, shiny teapot with hot water, set it on the back burner, and turned the burner on high. After a minute or so, I changed my mind and started balancing my checkbook first. I turned off the burner, and sat inches away from my stove at the kitchen table. A few se...